OMG, Sam is such a dork! Getting all cutesy pie and introductory on everyone. Bottom line is, we're awesome. Yes, that's right, we're eighteen-year-old secret agents who battle evil and hope to save the world. (Me, Sam and Billy at least - the other guys are OLD)
BTW, I'm Tom. I'm Sam's crazy twin, in case you haven't caught on so far (about the crazy part, I mean). That was really nice of him, to call me cool. I guess I am. I'm a skateboarding pro, rock the drums and can walk on my hands (oh, yeah, that really annoys Sam - poor guy has no balance. Come to think of it, it annoys Jerry to - he always says I'll fall on my head eventually) I'm also a damn good ventriloquist.
Hmmm... guess I should say a bit more about myself. Oh, yeah, I have this weird thing about keeping my eyes covered. I always, always, always wear sunglasses. I tell most people I have photosensitive epilepsy so they'd get off my back, but here I have to be honest. Fortunately, my family doesn't mind.
Speaking of which, Jimmy and I used to be orphans. I mean, we grew up alone in a home and everything. It wasn't pretty. Jimmy had to work, like a million jobs to keep us both in school. I worked too - had about three jobs at a time at one point. But we still rocked in school.
The thing is, when we accepted the first mission and set off for Mexico, we ran into Sam, Jerry and Kyle. Who turned out to be our brothers. Apparently, Snitch Gravel kidnapped me and Jimmy at birth and shoved us in Texas.
Wait, you have no idea who Snitch Gravel is. He's this crazy SOB (keeping it clean for the kids) who hates our dad and wants to kill us. He also happens to be some mega-crime-boss, with tons of goons and money and weapons and shit. Not easy to handle. He's been making our lives hell for the past four months. He even had me tortured for a couple of days. And I mean, really tortured - whip and everything. By some sicko who wants to skin me alive. Ugh! *shudders* I don't want to talk about that anymore. I don't remember much about it anyway. Except the pain.
Right, something else. I get along great with my new family. I'm actually used to calling my parents Mom and Dad now. Though I do get into the occasional fight with Dad. Over my girlfriend. Dad doesn't really like the idea that we're dating. Not sure why. Sam says he's always been that way. I'm okay, though. Dad is only mildly annoyed by Angie. It's Kay (Kyle's girlfriend) he REALLY has a problem with. Not sure why - she's ultra sweet, and smart and...hot. Yeah, there, I said it. But she is.
Angie's hot, too. Hottest of the lot, actually. That's why I went for her. Even if she's sooo stubborn and loves to shoot me down (and will probably hit me upside the head when she reads this - can I delete it?). Anyway, love her a whole bunch, even if I don't show it much. It's against the idea of me being cool.
Well, I'm out of ideas as to what to say. And I guess I should leave some room for the others.